If people in this world sell their blood to pay for school, what would people in a fantasy world do? Could you sell the ringing in your ears? The spring in your step? Could you rent out your heart to the elderly? Your brain to the tragically rich lothario trying to come up with better pickup lines?

Or might it be something a bit more… sinister? Something wriggling with the feeling that no matter how many times you wipe your hands on your pants, they'll still be sticky. A red sauceburn on your spiritual tupperware that no bleach can oppose.

Join our five friends in their ill-fated quest to navigate the carnival that is Tusco University. The professors who yawn and swallow half a class. The bureaucrats who couldn't crat their way out of a bureau if their salary depended on it (it doesn't). The good old sardonic, tragicomic pile of economic vomit.

If you or a loved one have been hurt by higher education, you may be entitled to commiseration. So come. Let us smile together in the pain.